Le Scrub

Allo my darlings,
I’m back and am about to prepare you all to usher in Le weekend in hairless and buffed style!

Many of you out there are, like myself, auto bronzant fans. With the damaging effects of the sun causing premature again, skin cancer and generally making people look like old leather bags that have been sprayed with windolene and left to dry in the sun, lying out and trying to achieve a tan au naturel is not the best option.
Don’t get me wrong my darlings le soleil’s rays are full of vitamins which make us feel good and help our general health and well being, but beware as prolonged sun exposure will result in you looking like our friend below




So the best option to remain youthful but elegantly bronzed is of course self tan. (I’m not using the words fake tan here as the very premise of this annoys me to the core of my being, a tan applied correctly should look real!)
When one is about to bronze oneself up it is necessary to be plucked and buffed.

I’ve already told you all how to remove hair at a really cost effective price and now I shall tell you how to buff, LIKE YOU HAVE NEVER BUFFED BEFORE!

Ok so let’s get something straight here, there are plenty of over the counter exfoliaters you can purchase and they are ok. To achieve a flawless tan and TO MAINTAIN IT, I’m drawing your attention to maintence as I really don’t see why people would tan unless they AIM TO MAINTAIN! (Really now people, emerging from a night’s sleep 10 shades darker than your normal skin tone and removing the tan the following week never to wear it again or until you next “wedding outing” is really going to give the game away. As I once told a good friend of mine Garret Simian, Tanning is a lifestyle choice, not a once off. You choose to tan for the rest of your life!).

So exfoliation, well you have got to prepare a perfectly smooth and blank canvas in order to get the best bronzing results and I am about to tell you how. I use a mixture I call THE SCRUB or LE SCRUB. It has actually become a bit of an urban legend in certain circles as it removes stale tan, scales, scabs, prevents ingrown hairs, moisturises and is generally brilliant.

How to make Le Scrub:
Get some caster sugar
Get some olive oil
Mix together in a large bowl, I recommend transferring to a sealable vessel for later use as this preserves the moisture.

How to use Le Scrub:
Stand in the shower and moisten skin. Turn off shower. Apply the scrub to the skin. (I recommend starting at the feet) The sugar will exfoliate the skin, removing dead skin cells while the olive oil moisturises. You can use a loofah or brush on top of the scrub if you have particularly stubborn tan to remove for instance. But be careful as if you scrub too harshly you can bring some blood vessels to the top of the skin which will stay for about 2 days. Rise off the mixture. If you have a residue left on your skin don’t be afraid to wash off with shower gel/soap.

I use Le Scrub on my visage every day and have blemish free skin. I really can’t recommend this enough as if your skin is a bit blah, this will sort it right out and remove any unnecessary scales. (It’s really good for buffing the glutinous maximus.)

When the skin is dry you can apply your autobronzant and see the amazing results!

So there you go, sexy, smooth and sugary AGAIN!



YUMMY

Sugar and spice and all things nice!

Well my darlings this is my fist of several enlightening posts on how to stay buffed, hair free and fabulous while not damaging the portfeuille!

And guess what, when typing sugaring into a google image search, I found a charmant picture of this homme swimming along in his no doubt, hairless state. (Probably a back, sack and crack aficionado, sugars no doubt!)

So what does a lady need to be smooth and sexy: SUGAR!

Yes mes enfants sugar is all you need. Not only does my recipe remove all hair, but it also removes excess dead skin cells or scales as I prefer to call them, allowing you to apply body lotion or indeed bronzing products with ease and sexy results.

Sugaring: what do you need:

This recipe gives enough to do roughly both legs depending on size.

Sugar: Any brand will do. I actually used Aldi's ordinary granulated sugar. (Mon Dieu I am dedicated to cutting costs eh!)

Water: I chose Chateau de Tap, I find this gives the best results.

Lemon: Again any type of lemon, organic, waxed or even cheapest of the cheap. Your only going to need a little any way.

Sugaring: preparez vous

Prepare your implements first.

1.Old sauce pan

2.Plastic sheet/baking paper

3.Wooden sticks if possible

Use an old sauce pan, a heavy duty plastic sheet for cooking on (I use JML variety that allows you to put the sheet directly on an AGA, I'm sooo county!). If you don't have one of these sheets, I believe they are called Magic Sheet, you can use baking paper.

Basically you want to be able to spread out your mixture, peel it off and apply to your body. I don't recommend putting the mixture on a plate or similar crockery however, as it will dry too quickly and we wan to keep it just above room temperature.

Sugaring: Method

Add one and a half cups of sugar, one cup of water and a squeeze of lemon to an old saucepan.

Bring all the ingredients to a rolling boil. What you want here is the mixture to turn to caramel. You have got to keep a really close eye on your pan as the colour of the mixture changes really quickly from clear to golden, then brown.

As soon as your mixture turns brown, move it to a low heat and prepare your sheet/paper.

Pour the mixture onto the sheet/paper. You are going to use your spatula/wooden stick or hands to gather up the mixture from this.

When mixture is cool enough to handle, but not too cool, (You don't want it to harden as it won't work.) gather up in your fingers (I'm using fingers here for this example but you can use your spatula/wooden stick) and roll into a malleable ball. Begin to stretch the mixture.

YES IT'S CARAMEL and YES, YOU CAN EAT IT!!!

But we are conducting hair removal here people so back to work!!

Apply the mixture to the chosen part of the body. (It works equally well every where but I suggest you start with the legs.) Smear the mixture along the leg until all hairs are covered.

Allow it to dry.

When the mixture is hard, grasp the end of it (this will be near your foot.), tauten your leg and get ready.

123 pull..... and ..... hairless legs.... ohhh so sexy, so chic, soooo sugary ;)

Continue the process and rinse legs with water to remove any access mixture.

As with any epilation avoid perfumes, lotions, etc on the area for 24 hours.

Et voila

Recession day 9: A terrible beauty is born

Bonjour my style savvy friends.

Welcome to Chic on the Cheap, Ireland's first blog that tells you how to get that certain je ne sais quoi quality at a purse friendly price!

J'en ai marre of overpriced beauty salons, major stores and the general establishment over charging moi for my extensive and dare I say, utterly lavish and glamorous beauty regime and lifestyle choices.

Day 9 of THE RECESSION kicked off with sunny spells and the illusion that we might have a little bit of sunshine, prompting me to ponder my extensive epilation programme!
Of late I have become disillusioned with the prices of beauty salons across the land, where over charging for waxing, buffing, plucking and bronzing is fast becoming too expensive.

These desperate times call for desperate measures!
Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country!

Well, in light of the general doom and gloom that the announcement of THE RECESSION, (there I've said it again) brought with it, this is my effort for the good people of these emerald shores.

RECESSION doesn't mean REGRESSION!

Ladies and (some gents, maybe of a gentler persuasion, or those who enjoy the art of preening, we are all inclusive at Chic on the Cheap) just because stocks are falling does not mean your beauty standards need to!

Good grooming, style and general chic does not need to cost the earth and lets face it, now more then ever we need to feel good about ourselves! (At least looking good is something to feel good about, thanks alot RECESSION!!!)

Welcome to the enfant terrible of lifestyle blogs now lets get cracking.......